Luos and Luhyas must learn to 'bury' the living...

I admire Kikuyus for their pragmatism when it comes to sending off their kith and kin. It is very different from my two real and acquired communities- Luos and Luhyas. I am a keen person and I like digging up the roots (not Phillip Ochieng's root words) of social behaviour.  

I have come up with a mantra to my family- I will bury people when they are still alive. This is a direct translation of a Kiswahili saying nizike ningali hai- meaning be good to me when I am still alive. This is a one man attempt to beat the obsession with burials.

We all remember the S.M. Otieno saga that led to the court defining that a Luo man has a house in Nairobi and a home in Nyanza. The renowned lawyer had to be buried in Nyalgunga against his widows wishes. On a good note, I have noticed an increase in the number of Luos and Luhyas laid to rest at Langata cemetery. This is a sign that the times have caught up with us because we had refused to catch up.

I like asking hard questions, in my attempt to dig out the root of this; I took a good look at my Kikuyu friends. They love eating meat so every holiday and a good weekend is a goat eating session. They meet and share in good times; they celebrate successes and console each other in time. Family get together is common where people meet and know each other.

In the contrary, when you cross the Rift Valley to the West, it is only at funerals that an animal bigger than a chicken will be slaughtered. Relatives do not meet as often and funerals end up as family re-unions. This makes funerals more than just a send off for a loved one. The food is an avenue for catching up, and the tea a refreshment.

I do not have a problem with those who can afford. My heart goes out to the humble families who have to borrow or sell property in order to buy a mandatory cow to slaughter. The bereaved are then left with a double loss of a loved one and debt to boot. To add to that some mourners still go away complaining how they were not catered for well.

Culture and customs have a context which they operate in. Like a piece of statute, they have a spirit and a letter. I will take the letter to be the social context that supported such customs and the spirit the social good it was meant to enhance. Every home owned cattle back then- it was a measure and store of value. People and communities had large tracts of land for grazing as well.

Unlike today where land is scarce hence people have reduced the number of cattle they keep. With reduced supply, the demand has risen with the price. The social support system that existed is no more, and resources have also diminished over time.

The other factor is fear of witchcraft.  People tend to offer sacrifices of animals when transferring curses. This makes funeral slaughtered animals safe as the reason for its death is known. If you doubt, go back to your village and slaughter a goat, very few people will dare eat it.

I write this as a way of asking the Western folks to reconsider spending huge amounts of money on the dead. A decent burial today costs an average of KSH. 500,000 (approx $65,000) - if you have to transport the body from Nairobi. We can minimize on this and use the balance to ‘bury’ the living.

It is not that I have no respect for the dead but there is life after the burial ceremony. The current economic hardships also dictate that we approach financial matters with prudence.

© Feb 2011